nothing before ‘but’ matters

What her father said…

  • She is very pretty, but she could stand to lose a little weight.
  • She caught her first fish, but she couldn’t take the fish off the hook by herself.
  • She has a beautiful voice, but she talks too much.
  • She gets good grades, but she has no common sense.
  • She is a good cook, but she burned dinner last night.
  • I love her, but she makes me angry.

What his daughter heard…

  • She could stand to lose a little weight.
  • She couldn’t take her fish off the hook by herself.
  • She talks too much.
  • She has no common sense.
  • She burned dinner last night.
  • She makes me angry.

6 thoughts on “nothing before ‘but’ matters

  1. Pingback: Gone (Cat) Fishing | 365 Days of Thank You

  2. God I know this feeling all too well! I’m still learning how to be a son and hear the positivity and encouragement behind my father’s words. And in time, I really hope to one day be a father and learn how to phrase my words in such a way that my child never doubts the faith I have in him or her.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It hurts sometimes. I am 42 years old and I no longer have a relationship with my dad. I guess it’s easier to pretend it’s ok to not have him in my life than to constantly feel inadequate whenever I’m around him. The lesser of two evils, I guess. I still pray that one day we will settle our differences, but until then, I focus on the things that give me joy. I like to think maybe they just don’t realize that the way they say things affect us the way they do.

    Like

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