growing up mommy (pt. 4)

…a continuation of growing up mommy (pt. 3)

So much has happened…

I guess I should start by saying that my kids have not seen their biological mother in six and a half years.  You may be asking yourself, “How does that happen?”  Well, a lot of things took place that eventually got us to our current situation. None of these things were good.

Priorities…

As you can imagine, it takes a lot for a mother to lose custody of her children. I don’t want to go into too much detail on specific events, because 1) this isn’t about her losing custody, it’s about me learning how to be a mom and 2) some things should just be kept private. What I will say is that there were drugs involved. With that being said, addiction can cause a person to do some pretty crazy things. They are just not themselves and they lose sight of their priorities. Let’s just say our kids were not a priority to her. Their safety and well-being were put on the back burner during visitation weekends and things happened. Eventually, we had to take a stand in order to protect them. We made the decision that she could not take the children anywhere or be alone with them. She didn’t argue.

I did what I had to…

I never wanted to take her place, but that’s where I found myself… being Momma. For the last ten years, these three amazing gifts from God have been my life. Well, them along with their daddy. We’ve had struggles, the usual ups and downs. Along the way, my husband shared God with me and I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. My son and daughter did the same (my oldest is still struggling, but we can talk about that later). The last ten years have been the craziest, happiest and most rewarding years of my life.  My world, that used to seem like a miniature model without much significance, grew into something that I’d never imagined.  I can’t say I would change anything, but I can say that I wish their mother could have experienced all that I have. Instead, she’s missed out on the most important parts of their lives.

She was allowed to come to our house to visit, she could call them, text them or communicate with them on Facebook. We did NOT want to cut her out of their lives.

Unfortunately, she did that on her own…

For the first two years that we implemented supervised visitation, she had no contact with them and when she finally came around, they wanted nothing to do with her, that’s where we are today… six and a half years later.

Time flies…

Now the “kids” are 16, 18 and 21 and they are still teaching me what it means to be a mom.

 

 

 

 

4 thoughts on “growing up mommy (pt. 4)

    • Thank you! I have definitely learned that giving birth doesn’t make you a mom, and I’ve learned so much more along the way! I am trying to catch up on your blog in my free time (I don’t have a lot of that). I’m on day 4, but I’m really enjoying it. I actually did my 365 days of being single when I was 24-25. I also didn’t know who I truly was without being in a relationship. I look forward to reading your take on it.

      Liked by 1 person

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